My Head exploding...

My Head exploding...


3:30am and this is the stuff I think about at this time of day so I am jumping right in, might get heavy off the top but hang with me I have a point and a happy ending.

Some times I find myself feeling overwhelmed at the state of the world. There is so much hate, pain, death, destruction, poverty, darkness…you get the picture. I get almost this intense urgency inside because I so desperately want my life in Christ to influence this world. I often feel like like I am not doing enough and though I realize I have dedicated my entire life to Christ’s purposes I get this heavy craziness, overwhelmingly passionate drive in me. I just know that I am not doing enough and it stresses me out!Maybe I am a bit hard on myself but I think we can all agree that we know ourselves and what we have achieved in the past and so when it’s just not happening we have to stop, step back, and evaluate our life.

Have you ever found yourself laying your head on your pillow at night and thinking back on your day and you then realize how much time you maybe wasted? Or maybe you didn’t achieve a goal you had set up for that day and the reason you didn’t achieve it isn’t because there wasn’t enough time, it’s because you grew distracted with something else that was not nearly as important as that goal. Well if you’re like me when this happens you end up out of bed, WIDE awake at 3:50am, and having a mental overload.

Tonight has been different though then before because God has spoken a small but SO true and powerful revelation to me. I want to share it with you.

Last week some time in conversation my brother read a scripture to me that I have heard a hundred times before I’m sure but the translation he used was slightly different. Well tonight as I was basking in my introverted, self focused, and stupid thought process I believe it was the Lord who brought this scripture to mind. Here it is: 2 Timothy 1:7 “7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” Now the translation I learned first and grew up with says, “power, love, and a sound mind”. Well here is Aria’s shining light bulb moment. A sound mind is achieved with self-discipline. A sound mind IS self-discipline.

So if you hadn’t picked it up yet, I have not really had a “sound mind” which then means I am being forced to look at my life and my “self-disciplines” or lack there of. OH MAN! Not the “D” word! There is no getting around it, influence and effectiveness come with discipline. I am learning you can’t just be disciplined in some areas. If I want to be effective I must be disciplined in ALL areas of my life. I think what discipline really boils down to is simply denying yourself. It’s living the fasted life. It’s waking up early enough in the morning to give God the FIRST portion of your day. I mean that’s the principal in tithing too right? Giving God the first fruits of whatever it is. How about real seemingly practical issues like carving out time in your day for fitness or eating healthy and taking care of your body? It’s important to be healthy and that means often times we deny our flesh and only put things that are good for us in our bodies. We don’t always zone out right away in front of the TV when we get home but we do the stuff around the house that needs to be done. We get in bed at a decent time (unlike me right now) so our bodies are rested and minds are sharp and alert.

So often I think we ignore or don’t give proper priority to these seemingly minute issues but ALL of it matters and essentially it effects our effectiveness.

I do think that I accomplish a LOT in a day or a week but I feel the challenge to step it up and push for MORE discipline and believe that when I do I will increase my influence and achieve an amazing spirit of power, love, and a sound mind.

Love to you All…